Friday, February 27, 2015

11 month old Bennett

I know every mom says this about every child about every month that goes by-------but I can't believe Bennett is almost one!  No longer my newborn baby, not even close.  How does time go that fast?  He is growing up so fast, and I just have to sit back and watch as his little personality emerges and he discovers things daily about his world. 

Bennett took his first steps the week before he turned 11 months.  I wasn't entirely surprised because he'd been freestanding for a couple of weeks.  By the next week he had taken 3 or 4 shaky steps.  Now he's up to 10 steps by himself, and honestly thinks in his mind he can go further.  He just walks that little Frankenstein walk until he face-plants.  And he doesn't go down slowly either---he just goes, hands in the air, until he's no longer upright. :)  Then he crawls the rest of the way (still Lord of the Rings style....that other knee never did cooperate!).

I have a hard time believing my baby is turning one because I look at him and still just see an infant.  Binky and fuzzy hair and all.  He's so rolly polly and fuzzy, and when he sits his feet are turned in and clenched like a gorilla.  Just like a baby would.  So when those fat little feet pull himself to standing position and slowly baby step their way across the ground unassisted, I have to remind myself he's really growing up---and quickly!

Bennett has 6 teeth, four on top, two on bottom.  He tolerates regular food, but mostly prefers snacks.  And nursing of course, but that is starting to slow down for sure.  I cannot believe we made it to a year nursing (I guess technically we have 3 weeks to go).  TMI, but I have only had milk production on one side since he was 5 weeks old thanks to mastitis and a clogged duct.  I thought for sure we'd only make it a few months, especially with me working.  But I figured I'd go as long as my body would allow.  I pumped as much as I could (which was not a lot) and went to painstaking efforts to get that milk home from Salt Lake.  My tiny little cooler with dry ice transported maybe 25 oz of milk, but it was worth it to me.  Bennett (and my body) grew to be very efficient.  And he also quickly decided he did not want a bottle.  Working from home has allowed me to not even pump anymore.  I can take breaks to feed him because he is so fast.  While I am an advocate for nursing, I also am also TOTALLY okay with formula.  Beau was on formula for most of his first year, and I think formula is great.  However, having done formula,  I really hoped to try the nursing thing with Bennett, and prayed to not have to buy formula (so expensive!!).  After my bout with mastitis I knew my odds were not good.  Yet somehow, my prayers were answered.  As we speak, 10 oz of that pumped/transported via dry ice in a cooler milk remains in the freezer, likely not to be used at all.  It's the little things in life that reminds me even little prayers are answered. 

Bennett is still on the chubby-appearing side, but I think overall he's actually not a huge baby.  He mostly fits in all the same clothes that Beau wore, but he's a little shorter than Beau was.  (Beau has always been long).  I think he photographs chubby though---his arm rolls appear pretty impressive, but in reality he's not super chubby.  Or maybe he is. :)

He has turned into my own little wrecking ball, too.  He mobility and curiosity have turned him into a little Curious George.  Between the 2 boys, I clean up messes all day long.  I sure love them though.  They are really starting to play with each other, but I do have to remind Beau not to pick Bennett up without my help.  (One too many times of just dropping him suddenly wherever he stood).  Bennett is very much an independent baby.  He wants to do everything/hold everything/feed everything to himself kind of baby.  And boy does he have an opinion!  He is not afraid to let us know when he is upset at something.  He throws the funniest fits!  I have to chuckle that my baby can fling his arms down like a two year old!  And he can climb stairs, yet I have no idea when he figured that out because we don't have any.  We were at the Children's Museum, and suddenly he wiggled himself right up a set of stairs to a play area. 

Bennett is not sleeping through the night.  Still.  I know.  We have horrible sleepers, probably because we are the all-time worst sleep trainers ever.  I have no backbone, and despite my nightly resolve to just let him cry, I am more desperate for sleep.  One quick nursing session later, he goes right back to sleep.  And we're all happy again.  And guess what?  I am TOTALLY fine with that.  When I'm not, the day will come that both of my boys sleep through the night in their own beds.  (Bennett sleeps in his own bed, Beau does not.  Due to my nighttime job, we play musical beds far too often to be consistent with him because I need to use his room so often.)  I do appreciate that Bennett puts himself to sleep, and has never slept a single second in our bed.  Lesson learned.

Bennett is also FINALLY  a happy baby.  I've mentioned before that he has been a little difficult to keep happy for a long time.  But in the last couple of months he has gotten very easy and pleasant.  He is such a sweetheart.  He's quite a bit more reserved/mellow than Beau was (despite his fit throwing).  Beau was always so extremely happy and animated and laughing (still holds true today)........while Bennett is more calm, peaceful, and quiet.  His big dimply grin definitely appears frequently, and his little belly laugh is adorable, but overall he doesn't say much.  Probably doesn't help that his binky is always in.  He definitely likes to play, and LOVES to play on the bed, but he also needs a good snuggle from his mom here and there.  He sure loves Beau too.  Well, love-hate sometimes----he can tattle with the best of them---but he watches/follows Beau all day long. (Unless I'm close by, then he's on me like a magnet.)  When it comes down to it, there is no question that these 2 little boys are related, but also very much their own little people.  And how I love them!

Happy 11 months little guy.  We sure love you.  Only a few more weeks until you are ONE!


Thursday, February 26, 2015

Little Patient

Bennett has had a clogged tear duct since he was born.  Poor guy has struggled with that leaky eye and associated eye infections since.  I was told we would have to wait about a year for it to self-correct, and if it didn't open on its own they would surgically open it.  We saw his pediatrician in January, and he said it likely was not going to open.  He referred us to an eye specialist, who scheduled us for a tear duct probe (sounds painful, my mom heart hopes it wasn't---and that Tylenol really was enough like they said).  Luckily, it was a very fast procedure.  He was sedated, but no intubation needed, just an oral airway.  They didn't even place an IV since it was truly only a 15 minute procedure. 

I've decided NPO is a form of torture for all involved, but we survived our looooong morning of no eating (up at 5am and remained awake due to one hungry little Bennett tummy).  We checked in, which ended up being longer than the actual procedure.  Bennett was very cuddly thanks to his long morning.  His morning nap was skipped entirely, along with a solid 2 hours of regular nighttime sleep.   I tried not to feel bad when the nurse took him from me, and then 15 minutes later I was walked back to recovery and handed a Versed-induced grumpy Bennett.  Once he was able to eat, he calmed right down.  He slept off the Versed the rest of the morning, and remained a little on the sleepy yet somehow hyper side the rest of the day.  We stayed home and low-key most of the day, but we did go outside to blow bubbles with Beau.  Bennett thought he was absolutely hilarious.  He giggled and giggled, and had an overly-exaggerated opinion on everything that day.  He was a cute little patient.  And now his little eye is cleared up.  Thankful for modern medicine and good insurance no matter how big or small the issue!

 (poor little guy)

 (purple dot on his forehead to mark the correct eye)
(He actually slept great that night.......he seemed to not have any discomfort at all.  Thank goodness!)

Zoo Day

The public libraries here offer culture passes to various places around the valley.  They are good for 2 free admissions within that same week.  They are SO great, especially on a budget.  They have some that rarely get used, but if you get to the library early enough, you'll luck out and get one to the Zoo or to the Children's Museum.  We have taken full advantage of these passes, especially now having 2 little boys to entertain during the day!  They provide hours of free entertainment, plus I have always been a fan of the zoo.

One blessing of being in the "student/resident" phase of life for so long is the friends we have made during this period of our lives.  You just learn to depend on those friends so much---for so many things.  Some friends are friends I will forever remain close to, no matter how far the physical distance is between us. 

The curse of this same phase of life is that the friends we make eventually move----always.  That is just how student life goes.  Friendships are forced to have hundreds of miles between them sometimes, despite my attempts to stand in front of a few moving trucks. :)

Before this last "batch" of friends moved, we did one last day out to the zoo.  So much fun.  So many little crazy boys running wild through the zoo!  They were so cute.  We sure miss our friends now, but hopefully it won't be too long before we see them again.  We had a fun day at the zoo---I even got roped into riding a dang camel with Beau because his little friends did it too!  Wishing our dear friends good luck in the next phase of life.  We miss you!

Friday, January 30, 2015

Becoming Friends

I love that Beau and Bennett are starting to become buddies.  Sort of.  Lots of side-by-side playing right now.  We've got a ways to go before they really start playing together, but time is flying by. 

For the most part, they love each other.  They both tattle on each other frequently, but they keep on eye on each other too.  I love them. 

I can't help but take their picture frequently because I know they'll be big in no time.  I don't want to miss anything, yet none of the pictures I take of them really are all that eventful.  Just a day in the life of 2 little brothers. :)

I started looking into real preschool this week for Beau this fall.  And he had his first dentist appointment!  And we bought him a booster seat this week because Devin accidentally took his regular carseat to work one day---and come to find out he fits in the booster just fine!!  And Bennett....holy cow the kid is over 10 months old.  That means he is almost one!! (Although he sleeps like he's a newborn still).  I still think of him as my itty-bitty baby, yet at the same time I'm already starting to mentally create a plan to wean off of nursing in 6 weeks!  He is crawling and furniture cruising everywhere, and free-stands all the time.  He even let go of the chair tonight and tried to take one step towards me.  How is that happening already?

While some aspects of kids growing up are nice---the little kid years are rough sometimes---it makes me sad knowing they'll never be little again.  Motherhood brings out the best and worst of me, and I've found my patience, faith, organization, and ability to handle stress has never been so tested in all my life.  A lot of days are just a "let's try this again, do it better today, don't fail as a mother" kind of thing.  But I sure love these 2 little guys.  I am so blessed to have them.  I get a kick out of so many little things they do, and find myself smiling all the time at their little mannerisms and interactions.  Then praying for a nap because I'm not getting any sleep! (haha, seriously though).  Sleep is overrated anyway. 

Love these 2 little dudes so very much.  They are my pride and joy, and hopefully they always know that. :)


(This is how I feel most days. :)  Cute Bennett.....can't quite figure out how to lay back down to sleep after sitting up.)